I will not apologize for being the shape that I am.
I have been many things in my life; some apologetically, while others, not so much. It is vital you know that I will not EVER apologize for the shape I am, for the space I take up, for the shadow I cast, my cloak falling like night as I flee from what once was a lush, protected haven, beneath the heavenly bodies that I unlawfully learned I had descended from, lifetime after lifetime.
Once my mind had been stretched by ancient wisdom, there was no returning. I wished to be unpleasing to a society that condemned and tried to name me wicked.
Cast me out, my body is mine, I shall not leave any place empty ever again; she is the sacred altar and the spell, and I shall only grow in power outside the locked gates of your Eden, for I am free.
I am the village witch; and I know that you will be back when everything you knew to be truth is on fire in your bones just as it was in mine once too.
I roamed the wilderness burning for a wild so pristine she had no name, only a soul deep gnawing that served as my compass. I wandered alone, filthy, starving, purging, and seeking nourishment for years.
They all come back, apologizing, hearts full of woe, ‘I need water’ on their parched lips; and I will turn you away, until you become unpleasing too.
Repent, by looking in the mirror, monster. See what ‘they’ have made of you. Weep for the child that was lost, do not cover your mouth, show your teeth, and cast yourself from conformity too. Acrobat your wild from the too small life your unapologetic worthy shape has outgrown.
You are the the fire, burn with passion, or be consumed, torch bearer.
Susan M. Conway
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